O Lord, Grant Us Meal Vouchers (A Traveler's Prayer)

Dear Lord,

O, the miracles of modern travel! O, the delights of seeing the world! O, the privilege of seeing far-flung friends and family!

BTW, in case one more request is cool...

Please grant me the ability to retain my gratitude for these blessings, even when dealing with the sort of travel woes that would make a nun want to punch a stranger in the junk.

As I sit here in the airport terminal, reflecting on the journey I began yesterday and have yet to complete thanks to flight cancellations, I would like to offer the following supplications and thanks:

Above all, now and always, I pray and am grateful for safety. I did manage to survive one plane flight yesterday, and while there was turbulence while flying and no air conditioning on the plane, the plane took off and landed safely, and for that, I offered my sweaty thanks.

This is why, Almighty, I am not complaining about the canceled flight last night. Because the plane might not have been safe for flight, and thus, I’d rather get stuck overnight. Plus, You answered two of the other important traveler’s prayers:

O Lord, we prayed for Meal Vouchers and Hotel Vouchers (especially the well-dressed woman standing just to my left, who was quite loud and colorful in her prayers, and might have accidentally used Your name in vain a few times, but I'm sure she didn't mean it), and we received them in abundance.

And Lord, we prayed – or at least, I prayed – for something to lighten the mood. Soothe the nerves of the stressed out travelers all around me. Something to make them laugh. Something that would – You know – “cut the tension.”

And lo, You sent a page across the loudspeaker that answered the supplication for silly. Perhaps the name of the woman paged was slightly distorted over the PA system; perhaps her name was really, say, Laura Naybobbitt, and an exhausted airline employee blurred some syllables. Regardless. The effect was the same: a much-needed chuckle, and the sound of thundering denim as hundreds of masculine hands protectively flew to guard sensitive areas.

The tension was cut (along, thank goodness, with nothing else).

My promise to You, Lord, is to remain an Amazingly Cheerful Traveler, no matter what travel adventures continue to come my way. I shall continue to thank the airline staff, tip the hotel shuttle driver, and let other travelers share their tales of woe as I shake my head and empathize. So long as safety, silliness, and satiation courtesy of airport vouchers sustain me, so too shall my good attitude be sustained.

I will also always remember that there is always a travel day far more difficult than my own.

May this weary traveler's prayer be acceptable in your eyes. Sorry about the part where I referenced a nun punching a stranger in the junk – it has been a long two days, as You well know.

Amen and amen.